Our Girls are learning all the time, it seems: Dimples wakes up every day with new words; LBG has improved her writing immeasurably in the last couple of weeks. DH and I are confident that the school they go to will provide them with a solid grounding in education. But what comes after that? My path, once school ended, was a little rockier than I planned. DH’s wasn’t: he was born focussed. We both, at this point, assume that our Girls will flourish over the next fourteen years or so and head off to University with the sort of excitement that we both felt.
But scholarship is only half of the story. They will also need to be able to live and thrive under their own steam once they leave home.There are many practical things that we can and should teach them, now and in the future, so that we know, when they leave our care, that we have done everything we possibly can, to give them the best start in life as adults.
This is a list of experiences we hope to give them, skills we hope to teach them, and memories we want to create as a family, that will give them the confidence in themselves to be adults: the roots that come before the wings.
1. Name, Address, Telephone Number: just in case they have an emergency and we aren’t with them.
2. What to do if they get lost. The above should help.
3. Travel across London on the Underground.
4. Navigate with and without GPS. Route planning is a crucial tool, whether you are getting the bus into town to meet someone, or flying half way round the world.
5. Use a camera.
6. Send and receive emails. I don’t ever want them to have a reason not to keep in touch with their Mamma.
7. Budget. For everything.
8. Have a foreign penpal/do a student exchange: to get a better understanding of other cultures.
9. Go to a Festival: something neither DH nor I have done.
10. Go on a sleeper train. Trains are a good way to travel before you have a car of your own.
11. Change their bed: I actually met someone in my first week at University who had never ever done this.
12. Do laundry. See 11.
13. Iron. I know you think you don’t need to, but you do, ‘kay?
14. Cook. You should be able to cook.
15. Grow their own vegetables.
16. Change a plug, change a lightbulb.
17. Make tea. I hate it, but Grannies love it!
18. Sew on a button. Sew a hem. These are basic things that will help you keep your clothes in good condition.
19. Clean shoes.
20. Erect a tent.
21. Light a fire: good for camping, but also in romantic country getaways.
22. Cook a meal on a campfire. If you can cook on a live flame, you can cook anywhere.
23. Play an instrument. DH and I suggest piano and guitar because they are ‘transportable’ skills. And the least painful to the ear in the early stages.
24. Tie their shoelaces, do up zips and buttons. This is one of the first genuinely independent things that our children can do.
25. They should learn about insurance. I don’t just mean travel insurance, but about having a back-up plan.
26. See live music.
27. How to pack a suitcase, a car, a box.You get to do a lot of moving as a grown-up. Packing is an essential skill.
28. How to write a good thank you note. Manners in general are important, and everyone loves a timely and well-written thank you note.
29. Road safety: from crossing a road, to Cycling Proficiency.
30. Personal Safety. Not just how to defend yourself, but how to avoid getting in tricky spots in the first place.
31. On which note, alcohol: how important it is to drink responsibly, but also to take care of drunk friends.
32. Riding a bike.
33. Mend a puncture.
34. Credit and debit: what the words mean. How to manage your finances.
35. Table manners. I have seen a staggering number of grown-ups behave badly at the table.
36. Host a sleepover. Attend one too.
37.
