It feels like a thousand years since my youngest was trained, but she’s only just three. Which means that this time last year, I was ‘in the zone’. She received pants as a birthday present from her Granny and that was it: she insisted she never wear nappies again. I have to say that part of the ease of it is her personality. Once she decided it was time, it was time. Which is my first tip:
1. Listen to your child. You know them best. If they are strong-willed you will have a different training experience to the parent of a chilled-out child. Don’t be badgered by nursery or grandparents. You will know. The children will tell you, either by themselves or with regular dry nappies.
2. Be prepared. Just because you aren’t ready to potty train, it doesn’t mean that you cannot be ready. Have a potty- assuming you want to use one (see tip three)- around the house, read potty books together, take them to the loo with you so they see the process work. That tip’s mainly for the working parent/s: I don’t know a stay-at-home parent who hasn’t had an audience when nature calls. I can also recommend having several potties: one upstairs and one downstairs, so that they are always within easy reach.
3. Think about how you want to train. Some people don’t want to bother with potties, which is fine. Some children are very tall and can go straight to sitting on the loo. If you have a boy you may want to think about whether you teach them to wee standing up. Do you want to use pull-ups or training pants.
4. Go shopping. There’s the aforementioned potty, and pants but there are other things to consider like a family loo seat– which has a fold down seat for smaller bottoms which fits over the top of the adult-sized one. It’s amazing how many children are terrified of falling into the loo. There’s a kiddie step so that they can access the loo easily. You will also need waterproof sheets for night-time training. And lots of pants and pairs of trousers/leggings/shorts- dependent on time of year- that are easy for children to pull up and down by themselves.
5. Bribery. Chocolate, stickers, reward charts, there are lots of ways to reward your child. At first you may need to reward them just for sitting on the potty even if nothing happens. Then once they get used to that, you can move the target by making the treat *ahem* performance-based. One of my children is a chocolate-fiend and would do anything for mini-smarties. She got one for, well, a number one, and two for a number two.
6. Train your brain. Initially you need to ask them every ten minutes if they need a wee. They will say no. Then wee down their legs. Get used to offering up the potty/loo a lot. Always go to the loo before you leave the house and make it your first job when you get somewhere. Stop frequently on long journeys.
7. Be kind to yourself. It will get you down, this training business. I was recently chatting with a friend whose fully-trained five-year-old randomly wet himself. Stick with it.
8. Take a bag. I have a ‘potty bag’ that I always keep fully stocked. It’s ready to grab and go whenever we leave the house.
9. Stick with it. This is generally the advice: once you’ve started, you can’t go back. I confess that this is not my experience. With both my children we have had what-I-call a false start: they both tried potty training, decided they didn’t want to and requested to be put back into nappies. Yet within weeks, they requested pants again and never looked back.
10. Praise. For yourself, for them. Repeatedly. Until you cannot do it anymore. Continue for about 18 months. Reward yourself regularly with Gin.
Go on! You know you want to tell me what you think!