Dear So and So

An age ago Three Bedroom Bungalow came up with the brilliant idea of Dear So-and-so so that you can write letters to loved-ones and total randoms and get a few things, positive and negative off your chest, as it were. As with many other things, I’m finally getting round to it.

My darling Pocket Dictator,

I want to thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for going into nursery (or school, as we call it) without tears and remonstrations for the first time ever, so that I didn’t have to run from the building feeling the enormous burden of Bad Mother Guilt. Now I know that to not feel the guilt feels….well, desperately sad. So sad, I sat in the car and cried. It’s good to know that the grass isn’t always greener.

I know that you love school. You know that you love school. You know that I know that you love school. Can we do this a bit more often? It would make my mornings much easier.

With all my love, Mamma x

PS. Don’t for one second think that it will make me miss you less when you are away from me.

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Dear Dimpled One,

I’d be very grateful if you could learn to settle yourself in the night. It’s not that I don’t love the cuddles I have with you periodically throughout the night. It’s not that I don’t love waking up next to you every morning, having given in to my need for sleep, and brought you into our bed at some point before dawn. But I do love uninterrupted sleep. And I love your father. It would be nice for us if we could both go to sleep in the same bed at the same time, and similarly wake up in the same fashion.

With all my love, Mamma x

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My darling darling husband,

there’s so much I have to thank you for. I know that my pregnancies, and post-natal depression have increased the burden on you to keep the house, the girls, our lives running, in addition to your practice. I am both more sorry and more grateful than you will ever know for all that you have done. But now you need to stop. And focus on your work. And let me get a handle on the girls and the laundry and the cooking and the mess.

You and I do things in a different way. It’s not bad, just different. So you need to give me the benefit of the doubt when you see a messy floor or full laundry basket when you get home. Focus on the girls: they love spending time with their daddy. I have spent time with them all day and am happy to let them have you for a while whilst I get other things done. It will get done.

All my love, me xxx

PS. It would be great if you could remember to kiss me as well as the girls and the dog, when you get home 😉

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Dear Smokey Litterbug,

you may not be aware of this but there is an ashtray in your car. If you must smoke, bloody well use it. Your car won’t smell any more than it already does by storing your fag ends in it. And, quite frankly, it’s what you deserve. Your fag ends on the street make more work for the street cleaners. Which  I help pay for. They also get stuck on the chewing gum other smokers and teenagers also feel like throwing in the street, and get stuck on my pushchair wheels. Which then gets stuck in my carpet. Which I have to pay to have cleaned.

It’s disgusting. It’s anti-social, and it pisses me off.

Angry of Bromley.