Domestic Goddesque

Technology has always been bloody annoying, breaking down at the worst possible moments, crashing before you’ve saved something really important, lacking a signal when you have an emergency. I’ve been suffering broadband issues of late; a whole thirty seconds of internet activity before it is snatched from me; hours wasted trying to get the wireless back up and running. And technological blight struck again yesterday. I put my Blackberry down on my bedside table whilst I had a nap, and woke to find it wouldn’t work. I assumed the battery had gone dead and plugged it in, but three hours later I still couldn’t get it going. I did all the stuff that people recommend: remove the battery and replace, try another charger and another socket, get your husband to have a look at it. Nothing. Nada. Zip. Zero.

I called O2 this morning first thing and they told me I’d need to return the phone to them and I’d get it back within 7-10 days. Can you imagine life without your phone for ten days? Especially when your phone is also your email, your address book and your personal organiser? Especially when you are pregnant and a) have a brain like a sieve and b) need your phone with you 24/7 in case you go into labour? I did what I do best at the moment and burst into tears, then shouted, then begged. The voice at the end of the phone suggested as I bought the phone in store, I should go back to the store and see if they could help. So despite the heat and the Hobbit-sized feet and the general difficulty walking, I did as instructed. And was told the same thing. So I did the same thing and was rewarded with a ‘courtesy phone’ so basic I can barely use it. It uses my number, which is good. It didn’t however transfer my numbers, my diary or my email. So I have a method of calling out, but no idea of the number to dial.

In addition to which, I had to call the people who make the Blackberry, as the guy in the O2 store got left on hold for 20 minutes whilst I was there and I got bored of waiting. Then I spent nearly an hour on hold doing the same thing. So I emailed them. They send out freepost packaging in which you send them your useless Blackberry and they return it when fixed. But as they have yet to acknowledge my email, I have no idea if this packaging is in the post. And even when it does arrive, I still have to get back to the Post Office to send it back to them and wait the 7-10 days to get my phone/life back. All of which means I will have a courtesy phone, for which I had to pay a deposit, for the next two weeks. And I will have to learn how to text the old fashioned way. And only check my emails from home. But most significantly, should I go into labour, and therefore hospital, I won’t have the carefully compiled collection of inspiring photos I recently uploaded to motivate me, or the carefully double-checked list of emails so that I can let friends and family know the good news.

I literally feel like I’ve lost my life. I had no idea that I was so attached to technology. Or that technology could not live up to it’s responsibilities. It needs to start.